Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Boston Santacon 2011: Update 3 - Lists, Costumes, Weather, FOUR F'S!!!

Fewer than 5 days and counting 'til Santa presses the big red button and the Red Felt Rampage is released!

Here's the latest from Santa:
  • Be ready for LOTS of Santa!
  • Make a list and check it!
  • Last minute costumes?
  • Keep you fuzzy flannel-clad fanny from freezing!
  • Four F's!
* * *
This year is looking similar to last year - so be ready for LOTS of Santa! If you get to a bar that's packed full of Santas, merrily Ho Ho Ho your way to a spill over bar or to the next stop.

* * *
Make Lists and Check Them!
Here's a quick review of what you want to bring:

  1. Costume: Wear a costume or get left behind! Doesn't have to be a Santa costume. But you must wear a costume! Come as Santa or an upside down Christmas tree or Rudolph the Russian mobster Reindeer or a ginger bread cookie or and Elf or Frosty or Charles Dickens
  2. Cash: Bring cash to pay for your drinks as you get them. Bring cash for the subway or cab fare home. And bring cash to leave nice fat Christmas tips for all the friendly bartenders and cocktailers that keep all the Santas merry!
  3. Flask: I'm not saying Santas are scofflaws, but this Santa keeps a Private Stash in his Santa Sack just to keep spirits high between bars. Waiting behind 300 Santas for a beer can take a while!
  4. Phone: If you're joining the Yule Tide later in the day and you want to find Santa, you'd better be following BostonSanta on Twitter!
  5. Route map:  (goo.gl/UMdJC) Learn it. Print it. Pack it. Santa will try to keep to this route and schedule, but no guarantees!

* * *
Last minute Santacon Costumes:
This is when you can usually find cheap Santa suits in places like Wallgreens or other retailers. Lots of options online, just be sure it gets delivered before 12/17! If you haven't found a costume yet GO FUCKING FIND ONE!

* * *
goo.gl/vlMhG and goo.gl/k3ieO

The weather's looking clear and cold, so make sure you're prepared for the walking between stops. If the weather really sucks, Santa will say "Fuck it!" and raze hell where ever he's at then take the Subway to Central. None of this will be decided before we start at noon on Saturday.

To be clear: Santa rides from noon on Saturday 'til he falls over no matter what the weather looks like. I don't want any belly aching from Wimpy the Elf about SNOW. Santa lives at the NORTH FREAKIN POLE. Santa drives a SLEIGH.

* * *
Four F's
Do not forget the Four F's!
  • Don't fuck with kids!
  • Don't fuck with cops!
  • Don't fuck with security!
  • Don't fuck with Santa!
Please feel welcome to bring your prankster presence. Megaphones and merry mischief are cordially invited! Santacon is hardly an event for the socially squeamish.

And please keep in mind: there is no "Santa Bail Fund". Anyone who crosses the Fun Line into Asshole Land is unwelcome. Play nice or get left behind. If you see any Poser Santas breaking the rules, tell them to knock it the fuck off or they'll get their furry fannies paddled 'til they fudge their flannels.

The clock is counting down!
Santa's coming to town!!

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Boston Santacon Update 2: Route, Times, Locations, Google map, WHEEE!!

 Ho Ho Holycrap!
9 days til Santacon!!

* * *
Last year was epic chaos so the Santas have lined up EXTRA Spill-Over bars at every stop (you're welcome! Santa loves you too!). 

Here are the highlights:
  • 12:00 Porter Square - Christopher's & Tavern in The Square Porter
  • 2:00 - Cambridge Common (Spill-over at Temple Bar, West Side Lounge, O'Sullivan's)
  • 3:30 Harvard Square - Grafton Street & John Harvard's (Spill-over at Whitney's, Grendel's, Charlie's)
  • Mini-jump - People's Republik, Plough & Stars
  • 5:00 dinner in Central Square - Tavern in The Square & The Asgard (Spill-over at Cantab Lounge, Miracle of Science)
  • 9:30 Santa Dance Parties - Middlesex Lounge, Zuzu, Phoenix Landing

There's just no freakin way that all the Santas can fit into one bar. If this year looks anything like last year, it'll be tough for all the Santas to fit into TWO bars. So be prepared to go with the flow - if it looks like one stop is full, merrily make your way to a Spill-Over bar, or head over to the next destination, or mini-jump to someplace in between.

Check out our Google Map for all the details. 

View Boston Santacon 2011: 12/17!! in a larger map

* * *
Be Extra Nice to bar staff!
Part of the greatness of Santacon is bringing a surprise bonus of sales, tips, fun and good cheer to bar staff on an otherwise slow Saturday afternoon. Be patient with and gracious to the bar staff. Show your appreciation with a few extra bucks on their tip. This is what keeps Santa welcomed back year after year. The bar staff are Santa's hosts. 200 unruly Santas are difficult to deal with - disrespecting our hosts is the swiftest way to get Santa unapologetically ejected.

If you get the sense that Santa isn't welcomed by the bar staff, please encourage Santa to head out to the next stop. Santa much prefers to hop down to the next closest bar than to piss off an entire establishment's staff and management.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Boston Santacon 2011 Flier / Poster

The Media Elves have finished our flier / poster for Boston Santacon 2011!

Check it out, download, print,  post 5,000 full-color copies all over the city, hang it on your fridge, your door, your wall, your cube, your monitor, or your ceiling over your bed, or mail it inconspicuously to 300 of your closest friends ...

You can view it by clicking on the link to the right under "PAGES" titled "Boston Santacon 2011 Flier / Poster".

Or click HERE!

Friday, December 2, 2011

Boston Santacon 2011: Update 1

Listen up, all Ye Merry Santas and Elves:
We're 2 weeks away from Go Time. Here's some info from Santa to all you Krazy Kringles:
  • Four F's - Who remembers the Four Fs?
  • Costumes - Ya got those Santa Pants screwed on yet?
  • Updates - We're just getting warmed up ...

* * *
I'm sure a lot of you Snowflakes remember the Four F's from past Santacons, but Santa's gonna remind you anyway. If you're new to the Red Felt Rampage, the Four Fs keep Santas safe and out of trouble, so you better drill this 'til it comes outta your mouth faster than Ho-Ho-Hos or last night's Nog!

What are the Four F's?
  • Don't fuck with kids!
  • Don't fuck with cops!
  • Don't fuck with security!
  • Don't fuck with Santa!

And remember: There's no "Bail Fund" for Incarcerated Santas. Any Santas that cross the fun line into asshole land will be told to leave immediately. It's our gracious attitude and good spirit that keeps Santa welcome at these bars. So if you see any Poser Santas breaking the rules, tell them to knock it the fuck off immediately or they’ll get their furry fannies paddled ‘til they fudge their flannels!

* * *
Big day is only 2 weeks away! If you haven't got a costume, you'd best figure that shit out! 
Santacon Costume links:
  • santa suits online:
    • http://bit.ly/5TukiX
    • http://bit.ly/5bUdMB
    • http://bit.ly/8ZcFWX
  • Santa suits on Ebay: http://bit.ly/8cuhaA
  • Tips on making your own cheap and dirty santa suit: http://bit.ly/5i0xco
  • and check out the link on the right under "PAGES" titled "Santacon Costume Tips". 
You don't have to come as Santa, but you gotta wear a costume. So come as Santa, or an upside down Christmas tree, or Rudolph the Russian Mobster Reindeer, or Santa, or a Ginger Bread Cookie, or an Elf, or Frosty, or Santa, or Charles Dickens, or ...

* * *
This the first of the Updates for all you Naughty & Nicey St. Nicks: as the days count down, more updates will follow just to make sure you've screwed your Santa Pants on right!

This year's route is nearly completed, just awaiting confirmation from a couple bars. Once the route is set, an update will go out with a link to the Google Map. Like last year, we're trying to find a route with plenty of spill-over bars, which gets kinda tricky. There are TONS of great bars, but the past couple years have been too much Santa for any one bar to hold. It's not easy to find multiple neighborhoods with multiple bars all linked by a route for a few hundred Santas to stumble.

Our flier/poster will be sent out and posted in a couple days. In the upcoming week, updates will also get posted around to a bunch of sites. No one should have any trouble finding details. But if you know somebody who wants to attend and can't figure out how to search the Tubes, feel free to email Santa Boston directly!

the clock is counting down! so you'd better watch out! you'd better not cry!
Merry as hell,
Santa Boston