- Be ready for LOTS of Santa!
- Make a list and check it!
- Last minute costumes?
- Keep you fuzzy flannel-clad fanny from freezing!
- Four F's!
* * *
- Costume: Wear a costume or get left behind! Doesn't have to be a Santa costume. But you must wear a costume! Come as Santa or an upside down Christmas tree or Rudolph the Russian mobster Reindeer or a ginger bread cookie or and Elf or Frosty or Charles Dickens
- Cash: Bring cash to pay for your drinks as you get them. Bring cash for the subway or cab fare home. And bring cash to leave nice fat Christmas tips for all the friendly bartenders and cocktailers that keep all the Santas merry!
- Flask: I'm not saying Santas are scofflaws, but this Santa keeps a Private Stash in his Santa Sack just to keep spirits high between bars. Waiting behind 300 Santas for a beer can take a while!
- Phone: If you're joining the Yule Tide later in the day and you want to find Santa, you'd better be following BostonSanta on Twitter!
- Route map: (goo.gl/UMdJC) Learn it. Print it. Pack it. Santa will try to keep to this route and schedule, but no guarantees!
* * *
* * *
The weather's looking clear and cold, so make sure you're prepared for the walking between stops. If the weather really sucks, Santa will say "Fuck it!" and raze hell where ever he's at then take the Subway to Central. None of this will be decided before we start at noon on Saturday.
To be clear: Santa rides from noon on Saturday 'til he falls over no matter what the weather looks like. I don't want any belly aching from Wimpy the Elf about SNOW. Santa lives at the NORTH FREAKIN POLE. Santa drives a SLEIGH.
* * *
- Don't fuck with kids!
- Don't fuck with cops!
- Don't fuck with security!
- Don't fuck with Santa!
And please keep in mind: there is no "Santa Bail Fund". Anyone who crosses the Fun Line into Asshole Land is unwelcome. Play nice or get left behind. If you see any Poser Santas breaking the rules, tell them to knock it the fuck off or they'll get their furry fannies paddled 'til they fudge their flannels.
The clock is counting down!
Santa's coming to town!!